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Thursday, November 17, 2005 ( 8:44:00 AM ) Miss Scarlet Sometimes I feel like I have a chronic case of the butterflies. Right now I feel sick from the fluttering that is going on in my stomach. I wouldn't describe myself as a nervous person but I also would never describe myself as a "girly girl." So while I want to blame my butterfly feeling to nerves, I know that there is more to it than that and also, I would rather appear as a strong person who doesn't let much get to me. But is the flip side so much better? Do I want to be perceived and known as a person who gets giddy over little things and gets lovesick when not even in love? But then it occurs to me-maybe I do. Is it so bad to get excited over little things? and focus on the positive in an otherwise mundane situation in order to get excited about it? The butterflies though...they're taking over my life. I'm to the point of almost wishing I was sick with a stomach virus to explain it. I'm sick of spending my day overanalyzing everything that goes on just to give explanation and clarity to things. The introvert in me (and yes, it's there) causes me to think incessantly, which is fine and I enjoy my grand conclusions I come to. They make me laugh. What is weird to me is when the thinking overflows from my brain and out of my mouth to the ear's of the unfortunate listeners around me. Last night something frightened me as I was driving and I got that feeling in my stomach that is most closely described as fear. I had never made the connection between the feeling of butterflies and that feeling you get when you think a car is about to sideswipe you. Now would be the appropriate time in this blog to make the connection between butterflies and fear and what am I so afraid of but I don't think it's that easy. I have to do some more thinking on it... #
Comments:
I got butterflies just reading your post because I know exactly what you mean about that feeling. And, I don't care what anyone says, I hate that feeling. It doesn't matter whether it's fear or 'I think I'm in love and excited to see this person'...the feeling terrifies me. Of course, I haven't had the "positive" butterflies in a while.
Also, we are not your unfortunate listeners, we are your friends and want the overflow. Don't ever feel bad/guilty for the share/ramble/rant. If I worried about my overflow, I would think you guys hated me because lord knows I go on enough. : )
But while it feels the same way as 'fear', it's not something I'm afraid of. I don't even know why sometimes.
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